Forgiveness

Forgiveness -- that thing we all need to do but just can't always find the strength to do. It is easy to be hurt and offended by the careless actions of others. What is not so easy is to forgive them for these actions. These actions which sometimes effect us directly and sometimes don't have anything to do with us. Why is this?

For me it honestly is probably pride. Why should I be the one to forgive when they never even apologized. The humbling fact is they probably don't even know or realize that they have hurt or offended you. We hold the ball in our hands. It's our choice if we harbor these feelings of hurt and hatred or if we just let it go and move on.

I love what Elder Kevin R. Duncan says, "Even though we may be a victim once, we need not be a victim twice by carrying the burden of hate, bitterness, pain, resentment, or even revenge. We can forgive, and we can be free!"

If we can be free why not free ourselves? Why is Satan so good at making us think we are getting so much out of this grudge we are holding? When in reality the only one that wins from this is him! We don't, we don't win at all! I've seen the effects of this hate, bitterness, pain, resentment, and revenge in my own life and in the life of others. It is never fun and it is never pretty.

While I sit here in this bitterness and hatefulness I think to myself: who has these exact same feelings against me? I'm not perfect and I'm positive I offend people without even realizing it. What makes their pain and resentment any less than what I may feel towards another?

Elder Duncan continues later, "Too often we look at the offender the way we would look at an iceberg--we see only the tip and not beneath the surface. We do not know all that is going on in a person’s life. We do not know their past; we do not know their struggles; we do not know the pains they carry."

Honestly all we know is what social media is portraying to us. Or what we heard through the gossip vine, which is nothing. The view we receive from social media is so skewed, it's ridiculous. But that's a completely different note.

As I realize how much people don't know me or my life, it helps me realize that I truly don't know anybody else's life. I don't know what their fears are, the trails they are facing, what causes the tears to fall on their pillow each night, what love one they've lost, or even there tiny victories in life.

But I do know something. I know that they are a child of God. A loving God. A God that has so much love for them that He sent His Son, Jesus Christ to live and die for them. Just like how He loved me so much that He did the exact same thing for me.

"Forgiveness is the very reason God sent His Son, so let us rejoice in His offering to heal us all. The Savior’s Atonement is not just for those who need to repent; it is also for those who need to forgive."

The Atonement not only heals us from our sin, it enables us to be better people than we are naturally, to love others, to forgive them, and to forgive ourselves. The power that we can obtain from the Atonement is more than we can imagine.

Let us stop being victims of ourselves and fully embrace the atonement and all that it has to offer us. "Forgiveness is a glorious, healing principle. We do not need to be a victim twice. We can forgive."

Finding Purpose

You know when you have like a hundred things you could or probably should do? Oh yeah that is my life like every single day. However, I have the hardest time finding the actual motivation to do any of these hundreds of things on my list. There are just so many other thing that seem so much more entertaining that I can be doing. I think I have really almost perfected doing these other things in my life. I mean prime evidence of that would be the fact that I just finished the eleventh season of Grey’s Anatomy when I am pretty sure I didn’t even start watching it until maybe two months ago at the longest.

I remember being a missionary and being so productive. Okay some of my companions may disagree with that statement, but really we were always doing something. And I can promise we were not ever just sitting around watching soap operas. Okay maybe like once or twice when we caught a peak at the members TV while it was on. We had Plan A and Plan B for basically every minute of every day. Now I am lucky to know what I am going to be doing in two hours.

At the end of my mission I started to quickly realize that I was not going to have the same purpose that drove my productivity. I was worried about what would happen when I got home from my mission and just didn’t have a purpose that I was so passionate about. I wish I could say that I came home and just kept my missionary spirit and purpose with me always, but I can’t. I fell. I let the things of the world come in and take away from some of the wonderful things that I had just barely learned. To me it is amazing how fast bad habits can creep into your life. Satan is good, he is a pro at stealing the hearts of man. I mean he has been doing it since the beginning of time. So why? Why do we think we can out smart him on our own. It has never happened and quite frankly it is never going to happen. We need help, we need help every single day.  

Luckily for you and for me we aren’t expected to be perfect. Our Heavenly Father knows that we are human and that we are going to make mistakes, he knows we are going to fall. He is always always there to pick us back up and cheer us on. He even knows that we will probably screw up again and do something dumb. Yet he still loves us and is there for us without fail. I find so much comfort in this. I don’t know how you couldn’t find comfort in this.

With Conference coming up this weekend I am exciting to get a reboost in life. Find new purpose and better myself. I can’t live all of the mission rules or have hours to study the gospel every day but I can be better. I can find joy in the little victories and delight in the beauty of God that is all around us. Plus I tend to have a lot of time to myself like every other week…..that I could fill a little more productively. 

When I started writing I had no idea where this post would go, but I kind of like it. Mostly I was just putting off the hundreds of other things I should probably do, but do not want to do. 

The Blog is Back!!

Once upon a time I used blogging as a way of expressing myself. I blogged about lots of random things that I am sure the majority of people did not care about, but it helped me. It helped me feel better. It was a way of venting and pretending for just a minute that maybe people actually care what is going on in my life. I mean let’s be honest sometimes my life is pretty epic. So here is to blogging again. No I am not going to blog every single day, but I would like to blog at least every other week. I feel this will help me in numerous ways.

So here is to the revival of my blog!! J

Here is a little about what has been going on in my life since my last post.

For my job I am on the road. I am on the road a lot, basically like every other week. Being on the road this much I have a lot of alone time. I mean I am basically alone twenty four seven for a whole week. Which hasn’t really helped me in the friend or dating department, but that is a whole different story. Okay back to me travelling, I talk to people throughout the day, but they are all strangers and all I have to go home to is an empty hotel room. I would say I have had my number of adventures during the past few months travelling and making the most of the time I have at home.

I have used it as my way to get closer to one of my lifetime goals. That being to visit all the temples in basically the whole wide world!! Which I have been doing a pretty stellar job at!

Los Angeles!! 

The new Payson Temple 

Gilbert, AZ

Denver, CO

And my person favorite! Newport Beach, CA

I have used it as my way to visit all my random friends living in different places. I even got to spend a whole weekend with one of my best friends in the whole world Summer Jones! Plus go on epic adventures with my old companion Kenedy!

Loved seeing this girl in Cali this summer!

Vising Summer, this summer!! 

When I gave Kenedy a thousand tortillas! 

Oh, I also go to see Larson lots since I always
 have to go to the Airport!

Seeing old mission friends in AZ!

I have used it as my excuse to take selfies everywhere I go! I mean who else is going to document all of my random epic adventures.

Marble Canyon!

When I went to the Grand Canyon all by myself and
took 100 selfies!

I know this is not a selfie, but we cannot forget
that one time I point a season pass to
Universal Studios!

And this my friends is why we blog on a regular basis, so you don’t have this random catch up blogs that make no sense. Basically, I am just living life one day at a time. Thanks for taking some time out of your busy life to read my pointless blog. I promise that in the future my blog posts my actually be worth something.

-Ashley P

Ashley P is....HOME!

I am back!!!! Okay so I have been back for over two months now, but I am finally back on my blog! Not having a weekly email anymore is a little sad, but then I remembered how much I loved to blog before my mission and how it was a great way to rid myself of stress!

My family loves me!

 February 4^th, the day that I never thought would ever come, came. I returned home from serving a full time mission for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. If someone would have ever told me that I, Ashley P, would ever be a returned missionary, I would have just laughed at them. But those 18 months serving the Lord and meeting the people in the Chicago area truly have changed and shaped my life for the better. I am not going to lie, it was hard it was so hard. There were days I just wanted to quit and stop, but in the end it was so worth it. One quote that I come across on my mission is from Elder Holland:

“Some blessings come soon, some come late, and some don’t come until heaven; but for those who embrace the gospel of Jesus Christ, they come.”

I have learned some of the truthfulness of this message. Life isn’t easy, and it is never going to be easy; but the blessings, peace, and hope that come through living the gospel are not things I want to lose in my life. I have discovered that it is easy not to live the gospel, but it is just as easy to live the gospel. The choice is ours. Trails and hard times are going to come to us either way, but wouldn’t it be better to have the help of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. The beautiful thing about life is that we all have our agency we get to choose what we do.

At the "bean" with Hermana Barrett!!

Blessings came to me while I was on my mission, but since returning home the Lord has blessed me with blessing beyond my imagination. Things seriously just started falling into place for me. I was blessed with the opportunity to return to a job I loved the following week of returning home, found an apartment with great roommates, bought my dream car, and then got offered a job that I am starting to fall in love with!

I won’t bore you with all the details of my life, at least not yet. I leave that for my next post. Here is to the revival of my blog.

XOXO,

Ashley P! 

Last Blog Post

So, this is going to be my last blog post for this blog while I am out on my mission. Now that our mission is going online, opps I guess I should say that the Chicago Mission is now a Facebook/Online Proselyting mission. But now that it is online I can't really write on this blog anymore, but you know it was fun while it lasted.

I will be posting things on Facebook for missionary purposes, but please do not write or try to contact me via Facebook. You are more than welcome to email your write me and I will respond to you on my P-day. I love you all more than words can describe!

Hermana Peterson

The Lord's Work

Everyday I am reminded how I am performing the Lord's work. Missionary work is a great task that I am so privileged to be able to participate in. I am far, far, far from being the perfect missionary or even a great missionary but I work hard everyday to improve. I am pretty sure that the Lord knows us better than we even know ourselves, and that through him all things are possible.

I know that through the Book of Mormon our lives can truly be changed and we can learn the will of God and direct our lives in a manner that is pleasing unto him. When we have a testimony of the Book of Mormon, we also have a testimony of all parts of the Gospel of Jesus Christ, because the Book of Mormon truly testifies of Christ. I am so grateful for this opportunity I have been given to turn my life over to my Savior in hopes to repay him for all that he has given me. Unfortunately, that is the impossible task, and no one can have repay the Lord for all of their blessings.

Hermana Peterson

Life Keeps on Going

There is nothing quite like being a missionary. There are great and wonderful time and then there are frustrating times. But all in all I think it is worth it. I don't know Spanish, but I know that I will learn it one of these days. I have also managed to come up with something to say during lessons and no one has looked at me too confused yet. I was told once that I talk to fast, I guess that is a talent that I have in both English and Spanish. Yay me! :) Haha

I don't think I have ever been so happy to go to bed at 10:30 in my life. By the time 10:30 rolls around I am so ready for sleep. And amazingly enough when the alarm goes off at 6:30 I hope right out of bed. The thirty minutes of exercise does seem to last an eternity though. I am also still like half a sleep during it, but it does seem to be going a little faster than it did at first. I miss the good ole days of the MTC where we would just play volleyball everyday. I don't think a volleyball game would last very long with just me and my companion.

So before my mission I used to hate studying right? I think anyone who knew me before probably knew at least that. I remember also talking about how I didn't study and how not studying was part of my Lean strategy for life in general. I have changed my mind, I LOVE study time! It is one of the best part of the days. We study for four hours a day, and it usually flies by! I like personal study time the best and the opportunity it gives me to read the Book of Mormon especially and learn things I never realized. It is truly and amazing and inspired book. Also, lets me honest if I am going to be teaching other especially in a different language like Spanish I need to know so much more than I already know.

I hope everything is going great back in Cache Valley or wherever you are! And whoever you are! I would love to hear from just about anyone! I love checking the mailbox everyday, but it is even better when there is mail in the mailbox! God knows and loves us all. I know this.

Hermana Peterson

PS. Sorry no pictures, maybe I will take some one day.